TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: Why are you late Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, "School ahead. Go slow."
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your
      multiplication  on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Greg, how would you spell "crocodile?"
GREG: K-R-O-K-O-D- I-A-L
TEACHER: No Greg, that's incorrect.
GREG: Maybe it's incorrect, but you asked me
     how "I" spelled  it.

>~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~
TEACHER: Ryan, what is the chemical formula for water?
RYAN: H I J K L M N O
TEACHER: Ryan, what are you talking about?
RYAN: Well, yesterday you said it was H to O.

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TEACHER: Hunter, name one important thing that
     we have today that we didn't have 10 years ago.
HUNTER: Me !

>~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~
TEACHER: Adam, why do you always get so dirty?
ADAM: Well, I guess it's because I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER: Beth, give me a sentence starting with "I".
BETH: I is.......... .
TEACHER: No Beth.....Always say "I am"....not "I is".
BETH: All right....... .."I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,  but also admitted it. Now Alex, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
ALEX: Because George still had the ax in his   hand.

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TEACHER: Now, Macy, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
MACY: No Ma'am, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook.

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TEACHER: Daniel, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's composition. Did you copy off of him?
DANIEL: No teacher, it's the same dog.

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TEACHER: Parker, what do you call a person who keeps on 
talking to people who are no longer interested?
PARKER: A Teacher  
 
It doesn't matter how many people you send this to, just remember if it made you laugh, your friends will laugh too!